


Parasol

by lazarusthefirst



Series: Five dumb peas in a dumb pod [1]
Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Car Trouble, Cute, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Nonsense, Picnics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-15
Updated: 2015-10-15
Packaged: 2018-04-26 13:24:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5006413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazarusthefirst/pseuds/lazarusthefirst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>‘This is Parrish’s phone. He’s very busy right now, can I take a message?’</p>
            </blockquote>





	Parasol

**Author's Note:**

> A bunch of nonsense. The first in a series of similar shenanigans that arrive loudly in my brain while I'm at work mindlessly packing books. Enjoy <3

It was a beautiful day in early summer, and Blue and Gansey were going on a picnic. Picnics weren’t something Blue had ever attempted before - too many ominous voices warning that it was going to rain, or that she’d get a particularly violent bug bite on her ankle, or that the grass would be prickly. It was a testament to Gansey’s powers of perception that he figured out that she really liked the idea of one, if it was done right.

Gansey, luckily, liked to throw money at things until they were just right, so they headed off in the Pig with a beautiful picnic basket, and a red checkered blanket with a special rubber underside that prevented the prickly grass phenomenon. There was bug spray and bug-repellent candles and a cooler and even a big parasol that could be stuck into the ground, in case it rained. Not that Blue was averse to curling up with Gansey in the Pig. But it was nice to have options.

The only thing they didn’t plan for was the one thing even more uncontrollable and unpredictable than the elements.

‘I hate this car,’ Blue said flatly, backing away from the smoking engine.

‘At least you can always count on it to ruin the day,’ Gansey said cheerfully, but Blue knew he was cross with himself. She linked her arm with his and said ‘It didn’t ruin anything.’ And it hadn’t. The day had been magical. A butterfly had even landed on her arm - the only bug brave enough to cross the candle boundary. Blue was feeling warm and content and Gansey rested his head on hers as they contemplated the situation.

‘We could always call Ronan,’ Gansey suggested.

‘No,’ said Blue, immediately. ‘Call Adam.’

’No,’ said Gansey. ’It’s a two hour round trip at least, and he’ll never let me repay him for the gas.’

Blue patted his arm. ‘We’re not calling Ronan,’ she said gently.

‘Well, we can’t exactly call Noah,’ Gansey said. ‘And Helen’s in California. Calla? Your mom?’

‘At work,’ Blue said, annoyed. ‘And mom’s doing house calls today.’ She made a noise of frustration. ‘Just call Adam.’

Gansey rubbed his chin and frowned, and Blue was momentarily distracted by how she could be so attracted to someone who simultaneously looked like an old man and a five year old child.

‘It’s the logical solution,’ he agreed, finally. ‘And Ronan never picks up his phone anyways.’

Blue snorted as Gansey got out his cell. ‘Yeah, that’s the reason. He’d already be pissed he has to come all the way out here, and then he’d never let us live all this down.’ She gestured to the Pig, which was crammed full of picnic items. They might have been able to hide the basket and blanket, but there was no concealing the parasol.

They hopped into the car as Gansey dialled Adam’s number. It took three tries, but finally he got an answer.

‘Hey old man.’

Gansey blinked. ‘Ronan. Did I dial the wrong number?’

Beside him, Blue viciously flipped the bird at the sky.

‘Nope,’ said Ronan. ‘This is Parrish’s phone. He’s very busy right now, can I take a message?’

Gansey hesitated, glancing at Blue. She gave him daggers in return. ‘Eh, no, thank you Ronan. Can you please just put Adam on and then leave the room, thanks.’

Blue smacked her hand into her forehead as Ronan chuckled. ‘Well, none of that is happening,’ he said. ‘Tell me what you want or I’m hanging up.’

Blue seized the phone from Gansey. She’d heard every word (probably due to the fact that she has ears like a tiny, magnificent fox, Gansey thought fondly) and snapped, ‘Ronan Lynch, you put Adam on the phone and walk away right now or I’m going to get Calla to curse your tattoo into something involving your undying love for Declan. And teddy bears.’

Ronan just laughed. ‘Hey maggot, thanks for the inspiration. I can’t think of anything Declan would like turning up on the internet less when he runs for office.’

Gansey was losing hope. Taking the phone gently from Blue, he tapped the speaker option and put it on the dashboard. ‘Ronan, where is Adam?’ he asked, trying to sound nonchalant. ‘Is he ok?’ Adam’s cell phone was new, and he’d bought it himself, which meant he was never more than mere inches from it.

‘He’s right here,’ Ronan replied.

Blue frowned. ‘Well then why the hell isn’t he contributing to this conversation?’

Ronan let out a little sigh. ‘Because he’s got my dick in his mouth, Sargent.’

There followed a very, very long silence, punctuated only by Ronan making a disappointed noise and saying ‘Aw, why’d you stop?’ And sadly they both heard Adam's exasperated  _'Ronan'_ loud and clear over the speaker.

Blue had her hand over her eyes. ‘Just tell him where we are,’ she said finally.

Gansey whispered the address and what they’d need to restart the Pig. Ronan mmhmm’d along, then said ‘Ok, no problem. I’ll leave just as soon as I’m finished.’

Gansey immediately hung up and threw the phone neatly through the open window.

‘Well,’ he said.

‘I’m vaguely turned on?’ said Blue.

Gansey had to get out of the car and lie down in the grass. Eventually Blue got out too and retrieved the lemonade from the back,and they took turns swigging from it until the BMW finally showed up, much, much later than it ought to have.

And Blue was right. The car journey back was entirely hell, made more so by Ronan’s obviously bruised neck and an entirely mortified Adam sitting in the passenger seat. Ronan blasted the murder squash song the whole way, and no one even attempted to complain.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on [tumblr](http://thetrojeans.tumblr.com/) and [twitter](http://twitter.com/lazarusthefirst/)


End file.
